Eating, Praying, and Loving: Reflections on Solo Travel as a 22 Year Old

By: Jools Dembo

It was back in November when I decided that I wanted to take a trip in January. Once the craziness of the holidays died down, I knew that I would want to get away for a few days. My only obstacle was that I didn’t have anyone to plan a trip with. Now that most of my friends are college graduates, it’s harder to plan travel at the drop of a hat. I could go alone, I thought to myself. It was a daunting idea, traveling to a city that I had never been to completely alone. But it was also incredibly freeing.

I stayed in Charleston for four days. For those days, my voice was mostly used to talk to my uber drivers, boutique employees, and to order a drink at my hotel bar. Despite one dinner where I met a couple of mutual friends, I was in complete solitude. And it was the best experience that I’ve ever had.

I arrived at my hotel at around 1pm. I checked in, took a shower, and then got ready. Okay, well now what? I questioned. I had no agenda, no responsibilities, nowhere and no one that was counting on my attendance.

My trip wasn’t eventful. I felt as if I was living my everyday life. It was the first vacation I had ever been on where I could just… be. I sat for hours with my Kindle and my journal at the Waterfront Park. I got three coffees a day because there were so many cafes that I wanted to try. I took my sweet time looking at every single stall at the King Street Fair on Second Sunday. I went to the Gibbes museum on a whim,  took way too many pictures of the Palmer House, and even spent a couple of nights binge watching Southern Charm in my hotel room because I could. 

As a self-proclaimed President of introverts and a person who has always enjoyed my own company, the idea of spending four days with myself wasn’t daunting. It was therapeutic. Even though I moved to New York City on my own at 18 years old, the sense of traveling somewhere completely new all by myself was a totally different and eye opening experience. Palpable freedom overtook my senses because I knew that this time was completely my own.

When my friends and family ask me about my trip, I can only describe it by saying that it was one of the best weekends of my life. And of course, a large part of that is due to the fact that I absolutely fell in love with Charleston, but I think an even bigger part was that I was alone. For the first time in my life, there was absolutely nothing that I had to do. 

People have asked me if I was nervous or felt scared about going somewhere completely alone. Of course I was. Going to a brand new place where you barely know anyone is terrifying. But I didn’t let the fear stop me. And thank god I didn’t because I would have missed out on an experience that made me happier than I’ve been in a long time. 

We let our fear hold us back from so many things. (I still think about the Gracie Abrams show that I didn’t go to in 2021 because I was scared to go alone. Sigh.) But if we continue to live in comfort, we never grow as people. We never discover the things that we truly love (or hate!). Fear cannot be the reason that you miss out on your own life. 

If you’ve ever considered taking a solo trip, I would absolutely encourage you to do it. You never know what you could discover about yourself. In my case, I’ve discovered that I need to move to Charleston! 

If you’re considering solo travel, absolutely do it. Of course, make sure to be safe and do lots of research on the place that you’re planning on going (if you’re a woman traveling alone, I definitely recommend taking a look at A Solo Woman Traveling). Go ahead and book the trip. The only thing that you’ll regret is that you didn’t do it sooner.